LN Heintz

Lyrics

There's a river of death near my home in DeLand
Where the snakes are as long as a cypress tree stands
The water's so deep at the bottom you'll shiver
So be sure of your boat or your life you will give her

It was Saturday friends at the local saloon
A blue tick bayed about an hour past noon
A cracker there stammered thru the pain in his liver
There's a fool outside skiing on the river

Yeah that fool was me and I was up on skis
After flying off the dock I was knocking at the knees
Proud Mary yelled baby doncha know better
Hit me like a log, I was gonna get wetter

With my brother in law and sister in the boat
They had me where they wanted like a gator bait goat
I hollered let me in there but neither would listen
Deep in the swamp lots of people go missing

So I held on tight to that long thin line
Saw an alligator swimming up close behind
I plead and I begged can you go a little faster
Cause I think I'm gonna die yes I'm headed for disaster

Yea I looked to the left, saw a vulture in flight
And a cotton mouth hissing over there on the right
I closed my eyes to make it all better
Hit me like a log, I was gonna get deader

I looked to the left, saw a vulture in flight
And a cotton mouth hissing over there on the right
I closed my eyes to make it all better
Hit me like a log, I was gonna get deader

We sped along the banks, I was sobbing like a child
My eyes were both searching for the critters of the wild
My arms were getting heavy my legs were on fire
Up on these skis like a chicken in a fryer

We wended and weaved, returning to the dock
The big hand had moved four numbers on the clock
What a beautiful sight, those boards I kept'a kissing
Deep in the swamp lots of people go missing

Yeah I looked to the left saw my sister's big smile
While over on the right was my mom looking riled
I closed my eyes to make it all better
Hit me like a log, I could'a been deader

There's a lesson to learn, don't listen to your sister
She'll wanna have fun, so ya gotta resist her
Don't give into her pleas, don't get up on no skis
On the river of death, on the river of death